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Unveiling the Magician's Tricks

Maybe it’s just me, but it just seems like some things in life that can be so difficult at times could be really easy if I just knew one or two “tricks”.

For example, hitting a golf ball. I have a pretty decent swing, and can occasionally hit a really good ball. Other times, it looks like I rode the short bus to the driving range. (*no offense to those who ride short buses, of course).

There has to be a trick to it. Something simple, something minute. The golf swing is not that complex of a motion. I just feel that if I were ever to learn that simple little trick my golf game would improve dramatically and stay that way.

Same thing applies to making music. Music, to me, is art. I enjoy making it and I play everything by ear. I know what sounds good to me, and I keep working at a piece until it sounds good. But I can’t help but think there is a simple mathematical trick to it that would produce good music easily more often than not — and I’m just not getting it. Something that turns music creation into more of a science. I would hate to think that I would need to study theory for years before getting it, because to me it just seems

slightly… out… of… reach…

I just can’t help shake the feeling that there is something simple that good musicians and composers the world over are hiding from the rest of us. A simple trick which would turn me into a very capable composer of music almost overnight.

I just wish I could peek behind the magician’s stage and see what simple tricks are being used to make the seemingly difficult look easy.


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I don't know what to say.  I've started this post several times now, writing at least the beginning of the opening sentence only to delete it and stare at the blank screen.  I'm actually at a loss.

I go through this writer's block once in a while, but rarely when I want to write.  It's usually when I would like to be writing but can't think of anything, so I find something else to do and just press on with life.  These days I almost feel compelled to write, but today nothing of substance is coming out and it is getting frustrating.  My writing balls are rather blue right now, if you will pardon the crude imagery.

I guess I can talk about my day yesterday.  I had a great day.  The kind of day I will remember for a while, and the memory of which will help light darker days that may come for me in the future.

I was able to help a wonderful, smart, kind, and talkative(!) little boy by just being there for him.  I won't go into the circumstances of why he may …

Thank you sir, may I have another?

I came to a realization today.  I think I may be a bit masochistic by nature.  Of course, I'm sure I can also be a bit sadistic as well, but that is another story for another time.

I don't know if I am punishing myself for some unknown, subconsciously committed atrocity, or if I just self-inflict pain to periodically reassure myself I am still alive.  Not physical pain, mind you.  No, the pain I submit to falls squarely within the mental and emotional arena.  For some reason, I keep putting myself in situations which ultimately end up causing me varying levels of emotional or mental pain.

Let's see if I can come up with a couple of examples, and unfortunately for you, dear reader, I am going to have to be a bit brutally honest about myself:

I'm not happy with my physical appearance, and I haven't been for a long, long time -- like since-I-was-a-small-child long time.  No matter what I do, I can't get to the point where I would like to be.  When I look in the mi…